“The only time a man needed a lot of women was when none of them were any good.”

—Charles Bukowski, Women

Elder Paisios points out that women tend to be pious by nature. But once a man becomes interested in his spirituality, not even his wife can keep up with him. Then the wife must be careful not to become envious of his progress. If she begins to complain about all his spiritual endeavors and calls him a monk or priest in protest, then the man needs to tread very carefully. The aim is to grow together, but you will not always be on the same step.

Spiritual Life of a Couple
Fr Dn Charles Joiner

Above all, unmarried people, monks, or celibate priests, easily yield to the illusion that the source of their unhappiness is their unmarried state, their lack of truly human attachment.  But does a married person in such a situation not experience exactly the same in his relationship to the wedded partner, or indeed to any person in his relationships with them?  Deception and self-delusion have led many astray while the true character of their depression remains hidden.  They do not understand that they are entangled in the most unusual struggle with themselves and that their opponent is neither “the institution,” nor “a vow,” nor the marriage partner or colleagues at work or whatever, but their own wounded “I.”

Despondency: The Spiritual Teaching of Evagrius of Pontus
Gabriel Bunge

Kathleen Norris once said that married love is “eternal, but it’s also daily, about as daily and unromantic as housekeeping.” It is through daily practices and disciplines, whether we feel like doing them or not, that the decision to love is renewed and refreshed, and the commitment of love is kept alive.

Glittering Vices: A New Look at the Seven Deadly Sins and Their Remedies
Rebecca Konyndyk DeYoung

To acknowledge that conflict between spouses cannot be overcome, but managed more or less resolutely and to abandon the fiction of marital bliss in the direction of something like wisdom. What remains clear is that when it came to depicting the complexity and fragility of marriage, Chekhov neither needed nor offered consolation. This may explain why readers continue to find his portraits of marriage and family life bleak and why others find them life affirming. 

Marriage in the Short Stories of Chekhov
Mark Richard Purves
Brigham Young University

“I’ve noticed that those who marry cease to be curious.”

—Anton Chekhov

“A man and a woman got married because they had nothing else to do.”

—Anton Chekhov