Some seek to be initiated into the mysteries of iniquity, in idle or morbid curiosity, perhaps to write a realistic book, or to see “life,” as it is called. There is often a prurient desire to explore the tracts of sin, as if information on such subjects meant wisdom. If men are honest with themselves, they will admit that they join the company of sinners for the relish they have for the sin. We must first obey the moral command to come out from among them and be separate, before it is possible for us to meet them like Christ. Separateness of soul is the law of holiness. Of Christ, of whom it was said, “This man receiveth sinners,” it was also said that He was “separate from sinners.” The knowledge of wickedness is not wisdom, neither is the counsel of sinners prudence. Most young people know the temptation here referred to, the curiosity to learn the hidden things and to have the air of those who know the world.
If we have gone wrong here, and have admitted into the sanctuary of our lives influences that make for evil, we must break away from them at all costs. The sweeter and truer relationships of our life should arm us for the struggle, the prayers of a mother, the sorrow of true friends. This is the fear, countless times, in the hearts of the folks at home when their boy leaves them to win his way in the city, the deadly fear that he should fall into evil habits and into the clutches of evil people. They know that there are people whose touch, whose words, whose very look, is contamination. To give them entrance into our lives is to submit ourselves to the contagion of sin.
The Art of Being a Good Friend
Hugh Black
Category: DISCERNMENT
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“Ministry is the least important thing. You cannot not minister if you are in communion with God. A lot of people are always concer“Ministry is the least important thing. You cannot not minister if you are in communion with God. A lot of people are always concerned about: ‘How can I help people? Or help the youth come to Christ? Or preach well?’ But these are all basically non-issues. If you are burning with the love of Jesus, don’t worry—everyone will know. They will say, ‘I want to get close to this person who is so full of God.’”
—Henri Nouwen -
“It is useless to accuse those around us and those who live with us of somehow interfering with or being an impediment to our salvation and spiritual perfection… Spiritual or emotional dissatisfaction comes from within ourselves, from inexperience and from poorly conceived opinions we do not want to abandon, but which bring on doubt, embarrassment, and misunderstanding. All of this tires and burdens us, and brings us to a sorry state. We would do well to comprehend the Holy Fathers’ simple advice: If we will humble ourselves, we will find tranquility anywhere, without having to mentally wander about many other places, where we might have the same, or even worse, experiences.”
— Saint Ambrose of Optina
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Do not let the Devil sow enmity and malice in your heart against your neighbour; do not let these feelings nestle in any way in your heart; otherwise your malice, even if not expressed in words, but shown only in your glance, may infect through sight the soul of your brother.
—St. John of Kronstadt, My Life in Christ
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If you believe in the priest, there are many reasons for disappointment, but if you believe in the Lord, in Him you will never be disappointed! Tragedies occur when people do not know how to distinguish these concepts. The gifts of God are not such that they depend on the priestly virtue.
—St. John Chrysostom
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This is the law: Abandon everything that is dangerous to the new life, whatever ignites passions, brings vanity, and extinguishes the spirit. And how many such things there are! Let the measure of this be each person’s heart, sincerely seeking salvation without deceit and not only for show. Now is the time to cease from all theaters, balls, dances, music, singing, travels, strolls, acquaintances, jokes, sarcasm, laughter, and idle time. It is time even to change the time of arising from bed, sleep, eating, and so on. At other times and in different places it may be otherwise. But the measuring stick is always the same: Abandon what is harmful and dangerous to life, whatever extinguishes the spirit. But what exactly is this? For some, it may be the most petty thing, like a stroll around some familiar area with a familiar individual. All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful (1 Corinthians 6.12).
—St. Theophan the Recluse, The Path to Salvation: A Manual of Spiritual Transformation
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From this it follows that leaving the world is nothing other than cleaning up your entire external life, removing from it everything passionate and replacing it with something pure, which will not disrupt the spiritual life, but rather aid it. Be it in family, personal or social life—completely re-order your outward behavior in and outside the home, with friends and associates, as the spirit of your new life requires it. Establish rules and order in every part of the home, at work, with acquaintances, and when, how and with whom you spend your time.
How can this be done? However you can, only do it with counsel and discernment, according to the guidance of your spiritual father, or someone you trust. Some people do this suddenly, and it seems better, while others do it by degrees. Only, from the first minute you should come to hate with all your heart everything worldly and sinful, and estrange yourself from it, not wanting it or delighting in it. Do not be conformed to this world (Romans 12.2). After inwardly abandoning the world, visible departure may follow either suddenly or gradually. A man who is weak in spirit will not bear a long drawn-out abandonment—he will not stand firm, will weaken and fall. Such ones are especially overcome by passions of the flesh, which are like second nature to him. Therefore such people should always leave it all suddenly, going far away from that place where they wallowed in sin. A man strong in the spirit of zeal will bear it even by degrees. But for the former as well as the latter, it is absolutely necessary from the first moment of conversion to cease all association with the sinful world and everything worldly until the form of new life has been established. This is the same as fencing around a transplanted tree; for though the wind be soft, it could blow the tree over because its roots are still weak.
—St. Theophan the Recluse, The Path to Salvation: A Manual of Spiritual Transformation
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Before we enter into battle, we should always first find out when to act aggressively, when to act defensively, and when to simply walk away. Besides the fact that we use one or another method of warfare corresponding to our degree of spiritual maturity, at first it is always best to walk away, that is, to place ourselves under God’s protection without trying to fight.
Later on, when we know our enemies through experience and have studied their attacks, we can repel them without losing any time.
—St. Theophan the Recluse, The Path to Salvation: A Manual of Spiritual Transformation
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Regarding the universally praised experience in discerning thoughts, that is, which ones to carry out and which ones to turn away, there can be no rule for this. Let everyone learn himself from his own experience, for we never meet a man whose rules always apply to us.
—St. Theophan the Recluse, The Path to Salvation: A Manual of Spiritual Transformation
