“Does not all creativity ask for a certain encounter with our loneliness, and does not the fear of this encounter severely limit our possible self expression?”

—Henri Nouwen, Reaching Out

“Starving myself testified to the intensity of my loneliness, my self-loathing, my simultaneous distance from the world and my hopeless proximity, a sense of being—at once—too much and not enough.”

—Leslie Jamison, The Quickening A story of two births

“My loneliness was a full-time job.”

— Leslie Jamison, The Recovering: Intoxication and Its Aftermath

Since no man ever can, or could, live by himself and for himself alone, the destinies of thousands of other people were bound to be affected, some remotely, but some very directly and near-at-hand, by my own choices and decisions and desires, as my own life would also be formed and modified according to theirs. I was entering into a moral universe in which I would be related to every other rational being, and in which whole masses of us, as thick as swarming bees, would drag one another along towards some common end of good or evil, peace or war.

—Thomas Merton, The Seven Storey Mountain

“Go out and do something. It isn’t your room that’s a prison, it’s yourself.”

— Sylvia Plath

Feelings of loneliness can arise even more sharply when we feel like we are failing at attempts to connect or feel like other people don’t understand us. Both depression and loneliness feed on a cycle of negative thoughts in which we see events and social interactions in a negative light. Chronic loneliness puts the brain into a “self-preservation mode” that makes it easier for us to feel threatened and withdraw from others.

…

No matter what our minds tell us when we’re in a depressed state, we’re never as alone as we think we are. Once we do the courageous thing and reach out, we will find a way to connect again.

Why is Life so Boring?

I say the loudest in the room

Is prolly the loneliest one in the room

Tyler, The Creator – 911 / Mr. Lonely

“What I’ve realized in my limited time on this planet is that we are often hurt and lonesome and scared — but we find true happiness when we are connecting to people, losing ourselves in new experiences, and, of course, eating. And we are never more open to these possibilities as when we are somewhere unfamiliar, when someone’s inviting smile or favorite dish acts as the bridge between what you don’t know and what you’re about to find out.”

—Eric Goldschein, Anthony Bourdain And The Painful Joy Of Travel Life

“Sometimes all you need to do to cure your loneliness is to give yourself permission to enjoy the distinct pleasures of solitude.”

—Ben Fishel