“I’m like, this is really cool that I’m allowed [the Antonians]– I feel in this pursuit of godliness to link it – we’re in this pursuit of becoming holy, and we also have a distinct personality, and this is okay, right? The whole be yourself, don’t sin, the very Antonian He who knows himself knows God. Have your character and don’t do wrong with it. And so even in the stories that included wrong, there’s still a sense of you’re allowed to be your own personality.

Abouna Angaelos was a trouble-maker. Those people have the image of the elder Abouna Angaelos in the late days sitting in a chair advising, praying, blessing, healing, all these things, but that was after decades of this. He wound up there and increased in faithfulness, and God increased him.

But it was a sense of I’m allowed to be me growing. I’m going to make mistakes. I shouldn’t want to make mistakes or make mistakes on purpose, but I’m going to, And am I going to be healed? Am I getting instruction?

Because when they tell these stories, there’s a message behind it, and it taught me this and my eyes became open to this. How can I not pursue this? How can I having tasted health want to be sick? How having tasted God can I desire to be a sinner? I am a sinner. How can I want that if I have tasted God?”

Fr. Antony Paul

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