I don’t think there’s a single dumbass thing I’ve done in my adult life that I didn’t know was a dumbass thing to do while I was doing it. Even when I justified it to myself—as I did every damn time—the truest part of me knew I was doing the wrong thing. Always.
— Cheryl Strayed
Category: DISCERNMENT
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God is answering in four ways: delaying, reversing the request, not answering, or answering immediately.
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If you would wish to know the sure signs, which will secure you the real model, it is not hard to take a sketch from life. If you see a man so standing between death and life, as to select from each helps for the contemplative course, never letting death’s stupor paralyze his zeal to keep all the commandments, nor yet placing both feet in the world of the living, since he has weaned himself from secular ambitions—a man who remains more insensate than the dead themselves to everything that is found on examination to be living for the flesh, but instinct with life and energy and strength in the achievements of virtue, which are the sure marks of the spiritual life-then look to that man for the rule of your life; let him be the leading light of your course of devotion, as the constellations that never set are to the pilot; imitate his youth and his gray hairs: or, rather, imitate the old man and the stripling who are joined in him; for even now in his declining years, time has not blunted the keen activity of his soul, nor was his youth active in the sphere of youth’s well-known employments; in both seasons of life he has shown a wonderful combination of opposites, or rather an exchange of the peculiar qualities of each; for in age he shows, in the direction of the good, a young man’s energy, while, in the hours of youth, in the direction of evil, his passions were powerless.
If you wish to know what were the passions of that glorious youth of his, you will have for your imitation the intensity and glow of his godlike love of wisdom, which grew with him from his childhood, and has continued with him into his old age. But if you cannot gaze upon him, as the weak-sighted cannot gaze upon the sun, at all events watch that band of holy men who are ranged beneath him, and who by the illumination of their lives are a model for this age. God has placed them as a beacon for us who live around; many among them have been young men there in their prime, and have grown gray in the unbroken practice of continence and temperance; they were old in reasonableness before their time, and in character outstripped their years.
—Saint Gregory of Nyssa, On Virginity
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Once they asked an elder, ‘how can we find God?’ He said by fasting, or deeds, or vigil, or mercy–all of them–but must be mixed with discernment. Many have persecuted their body without discernment and have gained nothing.
—Fr. Mina Dimitri -
HESITATION
Hesitation is a psychological disease or a weakness in the
personality.St. James, the Apostle, says, “He is a double-minded man,
unstable in all his ways.” (James 1:8).The one who hesitates might say I am thinking and studying.
But there is a big difference between thinking in depth and
being hesitant.There is a difference between the one who studies in depth and the one who, after deciding on one thing, changes his mind to another then goes back to the first one and leaves it later on, without settling on any.
Maybe hesitation is due to fear and fear has its reasons. It
could be the fear of failure or acting wrongly that is causing
hesitation. It could be fear because of weakness and
incapability, or the fear of results and responsibility. It could
also be the fear of choosing badly and more than one solution is being offered.As one in cross-roads, afraid of choosing a road that gets him lost!
Hesitation could also be due to lack of self-confidence.
Maybe the hesitant is one who is not used to depend on himself and has no self-confidence.Therefore, he does not trust his thinking, his decision or his
good choice. He also does not trust his capability. He has no
experience to trust in himself. Maybe he lacks the knowledge
to trust in himself. He is the image of a man.The reason for hesitation could also be for lack in courage and valour.
He is unable to make a decision. Every time he progresses, his courage fails him. Usually, his will would be weak. Whenever he decides on a matter, he finds that everything looks the same and fails to choose one. He is not sure of the results and maybe of the means also.
Hesitation causes confusion, maybe due to lack of
understanding.He may have two matters, both are good. But which one is
better? Or both are bad, but which one is less bad? Or maybe
he is faced with a matter that he does not know if it is good or
bad? The vision is blurred.The reason for hesitation could also be due to many advisers
and consultants.He who has one adviser finds it easy to take one path. As for
the one who asks many, there is a chance each of them leads
him to a way different from the other, or gives him advice that
contradicts that of another. Therefore, he stands hesitantly
between contradicting advice, not knowing which is better.Contradictory readings could also be the cause of his confused thinking
—H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Words of Spiritual Benefit Vol. IV
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Our first intuitions are the true ones. What I thought of so many things in my first youth seems to me increasingly right, and after so many detours and distractions, I now come back to it, aggrieved that I could have erected my existence on the ruin of those revelations.
—Emil Cioran, The Trouble with Being Born
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In our current age, there are some monks who have deviated in theological issues. Also, some monks are simple; they fall into faults without knowing I remember the first responsibility entrusted to me as a monk was caring for the library in the Syrian Monastery. At first, I coded the books, organized them, and read them as much as I could. In doing this, I would find inside the front cover of a book a curse and an anathema against anyone who removes it from the monastery or contradicts the book; however, the book is full of heresies and innovations. Probably, a person gave it as a gift to a monk, who thanked him for it and prayed for him, without knowing what is written inside this heretical book. Perhaps an unorthodox manuscript, or an incorrect icon, given as a gift, might be placed in the church, meanwhile, it is all wrong.
—H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Monastic Treasures for All of Us -
Then, if the father [of confession] and guide deviates, one must not obey him, and his guidance must not be accepted. From this standpoint, the person ought to seek guidance, and at the same time, ought to be watchful”. He should ensure that his conscience is at peace with all the guidance he receives. And the father or guide should not be content with giving directions only, but also should convince and give proof of the teaching, through Scriptural verses or stories and sayings of the saints.
—H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Come, Follow Me
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Such a father you may be discipled unto.
If such a person cannot be found, the confessant should look for a spiritual guide beside the father of confession. It is preferable that the father of confession be the guide, for the soul of the person is laid bare before him. However, if he did not possess this gift, or if his time were extremely tight, insufficient to guide the hundreds of confessants, in addition to his other responsibilities, then necessity demands that there should be [another as] a guide. [This latter] supports the confessant by his advice and encouragement, and reveals to him [the confessant] what is beyond his knowledge so that he does not walk in a daze.
—H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Come, Follow Me
SO GOOD QUOTES 