To acknowledge that conflict between spouses cannot be overcome, but managed more or less resolutely and to abandon the fiction of marital bliss in the direction of something like wisdom. What remains clear is that when it came to depicting the complexity and fragility of marriage, Chekhov neither needed nor offered consolation. This may explain why readers continue to find his portraits of marriage and family life bleak and why others find them life affirming.
Marriage in the Short Stories of Chekhov
Mark Richard Purves
Brigham Young University
Category: MARRIAGE
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Chekhov elaborates on what he sees as matrimony’s central antinomy, namely that the wedding of one individual to another produces loneliness, an absence of intimacy, and a kind of alienation so acute it causes love itself to cool in a relationship pulled apart by the asymmetries of social status and personal likes and dislikes.
Marriage in the Short Stories of Chekhov
Mark Richard Purves
Brigham Young University -
“I’ve noticed that those who marry cease to be curious.”
—Anton Chekhov -
“A man and a woman got married because they had nothing else to do.”
—Anton Chekhov -
“If you’re afraid of loneliness, don’t marry.”
—Anton Chekhov -
“I’d be lying if I said our relationship was as exciting as the unhealthy relationships I’d been in in the past. It wasn’t. But I’d lost the taste for drama. The backside of Hollywood passion is disappointment and loneliness—and more often than not, resentment and cynicism about the nature of love itself.”
—Donald Miller, Scary Close: Dropping the Act and Finding True Intimacy -
“Marriage can also help you grow as a loving person in a way you might not have otherwise.”
—Gary Chapman, Love as a Way of Life -
Find someone who actually, really, truly believes marriage is a journey toward salvation; People get married for all sorts of reasons, not all of which are bad, but truly this is the highest calling and deepest meaning of marriage: to walk through life with a companion who shares your desire for union with Christ, who knows that the journey will not be easy but will be worth every step and any suffering, and who is seeking the Kingdom of God, proclaiming His good news, and becoming a light to the world. Find someone with this desire, dear ones. Life is inevitably full of joys and trials; marry a man who sees each happening through the lens of Christ, and together, you will reach heaven.
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One couple I know made a vow on their wedding day to “out-serve” each other. My husband and I evolved a pattern of making decisions based on who feels most strongly about the matter. If I want Chinese food, but he really wants Italian, we get Italian. If I really want him to watch a Jane Austen movie with me, he does, until he falls asleep 45 minutes later. It doesn’t matter who “won” last time, because a next time is always coming up. The future just keeps rolling into the present, and more good things to give and to receive will always be appearing.
Glory and Honor: Orthodox Christian Resources on Marriage
SO GOOD QUOTES 