Setting yourself as the good example for the other person, is of the utmost importance. For what the other one needs is your example and silence and love… Nothing else… This is what experience has taught me, both for children and grown ups – particularly for the grown ups. If you happen to express an opinion, make a comment or pass judgement on whatever the other one believes or practices, you will be hitting straight at his Ego. And the Ego will not admit, even inwardly, that what you are saying is correct. The Ego does not want to be told anything by anyone else. Unfortunately this is so… Therefore, keep your silence. Do not say anything until you are asked for your opinion. The Lord has said it clearly: “Give to every man that asketh of thee”. On all matters… Are you asked for your opinion? Then give it. That is my experience. Love and silence: with these two I am so happy, so quiet, so peaceful… I cannot describe it adequately to you. It is Heaven on Earth. I wish for nothing else…
—Mother Gavrilia
Category: SILENCE
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He talks about healing a wound, and does not stop irritating it. He complains of sickness, and does not stop eating what is harmful. He prays against it, and immediately goes and does it. And when he has done it, he is angry with himself; and the wretched man is not ashamed of his own words. “I am doing wrong,” he cries, and eagerly continues to do so. His mouth prays against his passion, and his body struggles for it. He philosophizes about death, but he behaves as if he were immortal. He groans over the separation of soul and body, but drowses along as if he were eternal. He talks of temperance and self-control, but he lives for gluttony. He reads about the judgment and begins to smile. He reads about vainglory, and is vainglorious while actually reading. He repeats what he has learned about vigil, and drops asleep on the spot. He praises prayer, but runs from it as from the plague. He blesses obedience, but he is the first to disobey. He praises detachment, but he is not ashamed to be spiteful and to fight for a rag. When angered he gets bitter, and he is angered again at his bitterness; and he does not feel that after one defeat he is suffering another. Having overeaten he repents, and a little later again gives way to it. He blesses silence, and praises it with a spate of words. He teaches meekness, and during the actual teaching frequently gets angry. Having woken from passion he sighs, and shaking his head, he again yields to passion. He condemns laughter, and lectures on mourning with a smile on his face. Before others he blames himself for being vainglorious, and in blaming himself is only angling for glory for himself. He looks people in the face with passion, and talks about chastity. While frequenting the world, he praises the solitary life, without realizing that he shames himself. He extols almsgivers, and reviles beggars. All the time he is his own accuser, and he does not want to come to his senses—I will not say cannot.
—St. John Climacus, The Ladder of Divine Ascent -
Where could you find offenses in solitude in order to practice these virtues? In solitude, there is no one with whom to talk, and so you live in involuntary silence, but in the community, there are the guarding of the senses and the guarding of the tongue. Guarding the senses is a virtue found in the community because in the desert there is nothing for the senses to gather. Likewise with guarding the tongue, you must gain the virtue of silence in the community before you venture out to solitude.
—H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Monastic Treasures for All of Us
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No one tells you anything? No one communicates anything to you? Bless the Lord! He prevents your interior from cluttering, and covers problems. Love with gratitude those carry your worries for you. Aid them with your smiling docility. Accept your “carefree state.“ God has established you in solitude, he himself to be your sole worry. It is His will that He be the only bread of your soul. Do not consent to strain your ears, not even to the “gossip” of the community. Only pray for those who are in difficulty; exhort them, if the opportunity presents itself, to love the cross of Christ. Human consolations do nothing but weaken souls. Do not easily speak or receive things in confidence. Do you think that someone else will understand better than Jesus?
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“If he’d learned one thing while he’d been away, it was that loneliness is the most taboo subject in the world. Forget sex or politics or religion. Or even failure. Loneliness is what clears out a room.”
— Douglas Coupland, Miss Wyoming
Pain, for instance. Everyone has it, most people want to talk about it, yet no one really wants to hear about it. Talking about one’s pain makes one boring and embarrassing. It imposes on the sympathy and energy of others.
—Noreen Masud, There is nothing so deep as the gleaming surface of the aphorism -
“I think the quiet is good. The alone, necessary. Every minute, of every day I spend with others; I negotiate. Where I fit. The space I fill. How much I speak. The words I use. How much I show, of who I really am. I am always negotiating. And so, it is a blessing, somedays, the quiet. Necessary; the alone. To switch off. To stretch my being in every direction; without want of permission. It is a blessing.”
— to stretch my being, f.gabdon -
Without noise, postmodern man falls into a dull, insistent uneasiness. He is accustomed to permanent background noise, which sickens yet reassures him.
Without noise, man is feverish, lost. Noise gives him security, like a drug on which he has become dependent. With its festive appearances, noise is a whirlwind that avoids facing itself. Agitation becomes a tranquilizer, a sedative, a morphine pump, a sort of reverie, an incoherent dream-world. But this noise is a dangerous, deceptive medicine, a diabolic lie that helps man avoid confronting himself in his interior emptiness. The awakening will necessarily be brutal.
The Power of Silence: Against the Dictatorship of Noise
Cardinal Robert Sarah -
For he who is angry on account of the things which have been done to him, and demands satisfaction would not be able to obtain the praise of forbearance; but when a man dismisses the consideration of all past evils, although they are many and painful, but is compelled to take steps for self-defense from fear of the future and by way of providing for his own security, no one would deprive him of the rewards of moderation.
Nevertheless, David did not act even thus, but found a novel and strange form of moral wisdom. And neither the remembrance of things past, nor the fear of things to come, nor the instigation of the captain, nor the solitude of the place, nor the facility for slaying, nor anything else incited him to kill; but he spared the man who was his enemy and had given him pain, just as if he was some benefactor and had done him much good. What kind of indulgence then shall we have if we are mindful of past transgressions and avenge ourselves on those who have given us pain, whereas that innocent man who had undergone such great sufferings and expected more and worse evils to befall him in consequence of saving his enemy, is seen to spare him, so as to prefer incurring danger himself and to live in fear and trembling, rather than put to a just death the man who would cause him endless troubles?
His moral wisdom then we may perceive, not only from the fact that he did not slay Saul when there was so strong a compulsion, but also that he did not utter an irreverent word against him, although he who was insulted would not have heard him. Yet we often speak evil of friends when they are absent, he on the contrary not even of the enemy who had done him such great wrong. His moral wisdom then we may perceive from these things, but his lovingkindness and tender care from what he did after these things. For when he had cut off the fringe of Saul’s garment and had taken away the bottle of water, he withdrew afar off and stood and shouted and exhibited these things to him whose life he had preserved, doing so not with a view to display and ostentation, but desiring to convince him by his deeds that he suspected him without a cause as his enemy, and aiming therefore at winning him into friendship. Nevertheless, when he had even thus failed to persuade him, and could have laid hands on him, he again chose rather to be an exile from his country and to sojourn in a strange land and suffer distress every day in procuring necessary food than to remain at home and vex his adversary. What spirit could be kinder than his? He was indeed justified in saying, “Lord remember David and all his meekness” (Ps. 131:1).
—Saint John Chrysostom, If Thine Enemy Hunger, Feed Him
Homilies on Profitable Subjects
SO GOOD QUOTES 