Category: ANGER

  • The demons of anger, strife, stubbornness and pride, all stand totally bewildered before the person who possesses the virtue of self-reproach, not knowing how to conquer him, but gnashing their teeth in vexation, defeated before this person who never justifies himself, never gets angry with anyone, who neither contends nor shouts, but with a soft answer and a kind word together with reproaching himself, solves every strife and disperses every anger. Such a person lives meekly, gently and peaceably, and is loved by all. He does not contend with anyone, neither does he permit himself to be angry with anyone, however much he is in the right.

    For he reproaches himself, saying, “If I become angry with this person and enraged at him, I will lose the virtue of meekness and the virtue of endurance, the virtue of love and the virtue of being at peace with people. And then I will be at fault”.

    Thus he reproaches himself – not for sins which he has committed – but for sins which he warns himself from falling into. Consequently, he becomes watchful and on his guard, and his soul advances towards perfection.

    —H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Before the Just Judge

  • He who reproaches himself is able to live in continual peace with others. Even if a misunderstanding were to arise, through his self-reproaching, reconciliation is easily attained. Strife worsens when each party persists in his own stand, each justifying himself that he is in the right, and the other in the wrong.

    —H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Before the Just Judge

  • Because they understood vainglory to be a recurrent and serious problem, the early Fathers recommended several practical strategies against it—most of which did not involve sneaking off and slandering yourself before city officials. For example, you could try to avoid excessive attachment to glory by avoiding any attachments to human opinion at all. So one Desert Father offers this advice on how to make “death to the world” one’s spiritual vocation: A brother came to see Abba Macarius the Egyptian, and said to him, “Abba, give me a word.” So the old man said, “Go to the cemetery and abuse the dead.” The brother went there, abused them and threw stones at them; then he returned and told the old man about it. The latter said to him, “Didn’t they say anything to you?” He replied, “No.” The old man said, “Go back tomorrow and praise them.” So the brother went away and praised them, calling them “Apostles, saints, and righteous men.” He returned to the old man and said to him, “I have complimented them.” And the old man said to him, “Did they not answer you?” The brother said no. The old man said to him, “You know how you insulted them and they did not reply, and how you praised them and they did not speak; so you too if you wish to be saved must do the same and become a dead man. Like the dead, take no account of either the scorn of men or their praises.”

    —Rebecca Konyndyk DeYoung, Vainglory: The Forgotten Vice

  • It is necessary for a disciple and follower of Christ to take up his cross. The cross means the various difficulties and sorrows associated with a Christian life. Crosses may be external as well as internal. To take up your cross means to tolerate everything without complaining, regardless of how unpleasant things might become. For example, if someone has insulted you or laughed at you or provoked you, bear it all without anger or resentment. Similarly, if you helped someone and he, instead of showing gratitude, made up deceitful tales about you or if you wanted to do something good but were unable to accomplish it, bear it without despondency. Did some misfortune befall you? Did someone in your family become ill, or despite all your efforts and tireless labor did you repeatedly suffer failure? Has some other thing or person oppressed you? Bear all with patience in the name of Jesus Christ. Do not consider yourself punished unjustly, but accept everything as your cross.

    St. Innocent of Alaska, The Way Into the Kingdom of Heaven

  • If any man thinks ill of you, do not be angry with him. For you are worse than he thinks you to be.

    Charles Spurgeon

  • “Remember the one who has ridiculed you, who has grieved you, who has wronged you, who has done evil to you, as your physician, your healer. Christ sent him to heal you; don’t remember him with anger.”

    Abba Zossima

  • Never react to what people say.  React to what they mean.

    —George J. Thompson and Jerry B. Jenkins, Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion

  • He talks about healing a wound, and does not stop irritating it. He complains of sickness, and does not stop eating what is harmful. He prays against it, and immediately goes and does it. And when he has done it, he is angry with himself; and the wretched man is not ashamed of his own words. “I am doing wrong,” he cries, and eagerly continues to do so. His mouth prays against his passion, and his body struggles for it. He philosophizes about death, but he behaves as if he were immortal. He groans over the separation of soul and body, but drowses along as if he were eternal. He talks of temperance and self-control, but he lives for gluttony. He reads about the judgment and begins to smile. He reads about vainglory, and is vainglorious while actually reading. He repeats what he has learned about vigil, and drops asleep on the spot. He praises prayer, but runs from it as from the plague. He blesses obedience, but he is the first to disobey. He praises detachment, but he is not ashamed to be spiteful and to fight for a rag. When angered he gets bitter, and he is angered again at his bitterness; and he does not feel that after one defeat he is suffering another. Having overeaten he repents, and a little later again gives way to it. He blesses silence, and praises it with a spate of words. He teaches meekness, and during the actual teaching frequently gets angry. Having woken from passion he sighs, and shaking his head, he again yields to passion. He condemns laughter, and lectures on mourning with a smile on his face. Before others he blames himself for being vainglorious, and in blaming himself is only angling for glory for himself. He looks people in the face with passion, and talks about chastity. While frequenting the world, he praises the solitary life, without realizing that he shames himself. He extols almsgivers, and reviles beggars. All the time he is his own accuser, and he does not want to come to his senses—I will not say cannot.

    —St. John Climacus, The Ladder of Divine Ascent

  • Of the eight principal spirits or faults, dejection and acedia most effectively link the monastic world with today’s psychological suffering. The spirit or demon of dejection is described as one that attacks at random, and prevents the monk from having gladness of heart.[32] It makes the monk impatient and rough with the brethren and causes him to feel angry, crushing and overwhelming him with despair.[33] Cassian also locates the origin of dejection as being from “previous anger” or a previous “lack of gain that has not been realized.”[34] The monk isolates himself and no longer desires to engage in discourse with others, so that Cassian labels dejection the “gall of bitterness that is in possession of every corner of their heart.”[35] Interestingly, Cassian discusses how this demonic spirit is not necessarily a result of the actions of others, but actions of the self. Cassian elaborates that one in this state should not isolate himself, but rather continue to interact with his fellow monastic brethren. This in itself is a remedy against this spirit.[36] 

    However, Cassian goes on to discuss that some dejection is acceptable and therapeutic. This is the sorrow that leads an individual to penitence for sin.[39] Finally, he ends the relevant chapter by noting that the way to terminate devilish dejection is spiritual meditation, and keeping the mind occupied with the hope of the future. In examining this chapter of Cassian’s work, clear symptoms emerge, as well as treatment modalities for what is considered depression in the modern world.

    In Book X of the Institutes, Cassian begins to describe accidie, or acedia, known as the “midday demon,”[40] as Evagrius had also done, although in more detail in specific relation to the emotions.[41] While similar to the demon of dejection, acedia consists of the added features of apathy, sluggishness, sloth, and irritability. In naming acedia the “midday demon,” Cassian posits that these demonic attacks often occur around the sixth hour and seize the monk. Carelessness and anxiousness are the main components of acedia, as well as frequent complaining.[42] The monk looks anxiously and often sighs at his other brethren. There are also moments where he is idle and useless for spiritual work. Cassian notes that sometimes the midday demon can manifest in different forms: sometimes one may isolate more, and in other times one may become a busy-body and seek consolation from others — an action which Cassian describes as entanglement in secular business.[43] 

    John Cassian, Diabolical Warfare, and Psychological Health

    Abraham Ghattas
    Doss Press

  • During your time in the community, you are testing yourself to see if you can bear with people. Do you lose your peace? Do you hate people? Or do you try to avenge oneself? If you try to isolate yourself in order not to engage in these troubles, you are likened to a person who refuses to take an exam for fear of failing. The result is that you will not graduate. The correct action is for a person to take the exam and pass. It is easy to sit alone and not make mistakes. Neither will the devil leave you; he will give you even more thoughts than people would, to the point that you will leave your cell saying, “It is better to deal with people than to deal with this mental warfare.” Take the test and succeed.

    —H.H. Pope Shenouda III, Monastic Treasures for All of Us